Bovie Movie

Director John Woo brings Hong Kong-style martial arts action to this comic book-flavored sequel that eschews the complicated plot and political maneuverings of its predecessor in favor of pure, adrenaline-charged thrills. Tom Cruise returns as Ethan Hunt, an operative for the top-secret government agency IMF (Impossible Missions Force). Fellow agent Sean Ambrose (Dougray Scott) has gone rogue, stealing a sample of a deadly synthetic virus named Chimera that could rapidly wipe out the world’s population. Ambrose’s plan is to sell Chimera to the highest bidder in exchange for shares of stock in the winner’s company. Summoned by the new IMF chief (Anthony Hopkins in an uncredited cameo role), Ethan is assigned to recruit the help of Ambrose’s former lover Nyah Nordoff-Hall (Thandie Newton), a gorgeous woman who left Ambrose broken-hearted and who may be able to quickly regain his confidence. Once he meets and spends a night with Nyah, however, Ethan is smitten, and now must both capture Ambrose and keep Nyah alive as she infiltrates a nest of vipers. Sophisticated disguises, gun battles, and high-speed chases are the order of the day, very much in the James Bond mold. Mission: Impossible 2 is based on a story by Star Trek: The Next Generation writers Ronald D. Moore and Brannon Braga, with a script polish by Robert Towne.

Charlize Theron stars as the woman who befriends a colossal but cute gorilla in this entertaining remake of the 1949 family drama. Of course, Joe doesn’t remain hidden in the jungle for long with explorer Bill Paxton on his trail, and he’s soon pursued by nasty hunters who want to capture him for some rich collector’s amusement. It’s a fun romp with impressive ape effects and luscious scenery, though young children may be slightly disturbed by scenes that show the cuddly King Kong under attack. 

One would’ve thought that Guy Ritchie would have shied away from replicating Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels after the glut of British gangster movies that followed its success. Sadly not. Although Snatch has its merits — among them originality and the talents of Brad Pitt, Benicio Del Toro, and Jasons Statham and Flemyng — the diamond heist and East End Mob plot are just more of the same. Gangs, cheeky chappies, bare-knuckle boxing and cameos from Vinnie Jones and Mike Reid merge into a “seen it all before” mix. Ritchie can direct, but perhaps he should get someone else to write the material. 

The Exorcist meets Carrie in this dumb but fun religious horror. Patricia Arquette is the atheist hairdresser who suddenly starts suffering from vicious stigmata — wounds identical to the ones Christ received on the cross — which, understandably, hinder her ability to give a good cut and blow-dry. When Vatican priest Gabriel Byrne is sent to investigate, he realises that there are more to her gory wounds than meets the eye — especially when she starts spouting a strange tongue which may be the true language of Christ. A booming soundtrack (from Billy Corgan of the Smashing Pumpkins), flashy images and pop video-style direction by Rupert Wainwright add to the film’s frenetic feel, and divert us from some of the less plausible plot twists. It’s silly, loud and gruesome, yet strangely entertaining. 

This self-deprecating and winningly indulgent cosmic adventure from director/producer/star Clint Eastwood is a complete macho-fuelled fantasy set in the ultra-realistic world of Nasa operations today. With an irresistible premise — four geriatric astronauts finally get the chance to go into orbit 40 years after being sidelined by a monkey — this slice of gung-ho wish-fulfilment is an entertaining feel-good pleasure. Eastwood’s Team Daedalus is called back into service because no other has the obsolete knowledge to prevent a Cold-War era Russian telecommunications satellite from crashing to Earth. There’s absolutely no point in taking anything seriously in this hi-tech Peter Pan fable. Even the space-set climax, brilliantly constructed by Star Wars supremo George Lucas’s company (Industrial Light and Magic) from actual photographs, space shuttle footage, miniatures and digital animation, lacks any real thrills or suspense because the outcome is obvious from the start. But Eastwood and his co-stars shine as the ageing astronauts, wheezing through basic training, navigating past feuds and becoming all-American heroes. Tommy Lee Jones, Donald Sutherland and James Garner also reveal the right stuff as well as the true meaning of star charisma and career longevity. 

The workaholic head of the compliance section of a New York bank flies to Monaco to investigate unusual deposits from an offshore bank and meets a down-on-his-luck international film star who has become embroiled in criminal activities.

There’s something to offend almost everybody in this raucous and rude teen sex comedy in which an American student (Scott Mechlowicz) embarks on a trip across Europe in search of an internet friend that he has accidentally dumped, believing her to be a he. In the process, every European stereotype is wheeled out: the English are all football hooligans, the French cheating lotharios and the Dutch sex-crazed dope smokers. But despite the gleefully crude borderline xenophobia, there are enough laughs in this good-natured follow-up to 2000’s Road Trip to keep the less easily shocked amused. And if that doesn’t appeal, you can always occupy yourself name-checking the celebrity cameos from the likes of Matt Damon, Lucy “Xena, Warrior Princess” Lawless and Vinnie Jones. 

A kind of First Blood for the George W Bush era, Shooter is a conspiracy thriller-cum-action movie that’s not afraid to wear its politics on its sleeve. When disillusioned former marine sharpshooter Bob Lee Swagger (Mark Wahlberg) agrees to help the US government capture a sniper who’s planning to kill the president, the scene is set for a Day of the Jackal-style confrontation. But Swagger’s actually being set up as the assassin and has to go on the run to clear his name, and expose the conspiracy at the heart of the government. Wahlberg excels in this frantic action movie, his chisel-jawed features perfect for the veteran who has taken his war home with him. Director Antoine Fuqua (Training Day) intersperses the gunfire with simplistic but hard-hitting asides about the Bush administration’s declining fortunes. It’s hardly The Parallax View, yet it hammers home its anger over the corruption of America’s political elite with unerring accuracy. 

Full of trademark themes and characteristic compositions, Stanley Kubrick’s final film is also his most fascinatingly flawed. With its style often resembling 1970s European art house movies, it lacks the morbidity to pass as a Buñuelian satire, and is too stately and serious to succeed as a commercial enterprise. Tom Cruise — as the doctor recklessly seeking a means of avenging his wife’s fantasised infidelity — is far too controlled for his character’s fraught nocturnal adventures to be plausible. Nicole Kidman, as his wife, is less visible, but simmers with potential erotic danger. Despite expectations, this is a disappointingly conservative conclusion to a career spent pushing back cinematic boundaries. Perhaps, after so long without directing a movie, Kubrick cared too much. 

This empty, lumbering spectacular turns author Leslie Charteris’s gallant law-breaker into a cat-burgling James Bond clone. Both Val Kilmer, in the title role, and Elisabeth Shue are miscast in a mundane tale about a Russian billionaire who’s trying to discover a way to glean energy from tap water. Scientist Shue has the “cold fusion” formula stuffed into her bra and practically the whole of director Phillip Noyce’s misjudged fiasco has her and Kilmer being chased by the Russian Mafia. It’s sloppily plotted, unexciting and laughable — Kilmer plays the debonair Templar as a cross between Inspector Clouseau and Leslie Phillips — and any episode of the 1960s TV series starring Roger Moore (who pops up as the voice of a newsreader over the end credits) would be infinitely superior to this expensive farrago.