Bovie Movie

Scary Movie screenwriters Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer join forces to parody the “biggest” movies ever to hit the silver screen in this comedy that gives such popular box-office hits as Pirates of the Caribbean and Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe the same treatment that Scary Movie gave to the slasher subgenre. A virtual smorgasbord of spoof, Epic Movie tells the tale of four fully grown orphans: one the victim of snakes that attacked her plane, another raised by a kindly Louvre curator, the third a Mexican “libre” wrestling refuge, and the last an average mutant from an “X”-community. When the curious quartet visits a sprawling chocolate factory, they stumble across a magical wardrobe which transports them to the enchanted land of Gnarnia. It seems that the wondrous fantasy land has recently fallen under the spell of the evil White Bitch (Jennifer Coolidge), and in order to bring peace back to Gnarnia these four bumbling mortals will have to join forces with a charismatic pirate, a painfully sincere group of aspiring wizards, and one particularly libidinous lion.

Chuck Jones’ animated version of the classic Dr. Seuss book How the Grinch Stole Christmas originally aired on television in 1966 and has since become a holiday family favorite. Voiced by Boris Karloff (who also narrates), the Grinch lives on top of a hill overlooking Whoville with his dog, Max. Each year at Christmas time, the Grinch’s hatred grows stronger toward those insufferably cheerful Whos down in Whoville. Content to exchange presents, eat large banquets, and sing songs in the town square, the Whos live in a blissful ignorance of the Grinch’s contempt. One year, he gets the idea to stop Christmas from coming by dressing up as Santa Claus. He cobbles together an outfit and makes his dog drag him around on a sleigh while sneaking into the Whos’ homes and stealing their presents, food, and decorations. After he has stolen every last thing, the Whos wake up on Christmas morning to sing in the town square, causing the Grinch to question the basis of his nefarious plan. Thurl Ravenscroft (the voice of kid cereal mascot Tony the Tiger) provides the vocals for the song “You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch.” This story was remade into a live-action movie in 2000 by director Ron Howard starring Jim Carrey as the Grinch.

For his sophomore stab at directing, actor/writer/director Jon Favreau (Swingers, Made), took on this holiday comedy starring Saturday Night Live-alum Will Ferrell. Ferrell stars as Buddy, a regular-sized man who was raised as an elf by Santa Claus (Edward Asner). When the news is finally broken to Buddy that he’s not a real elf, he decides to head back to his place of birth, New York City, in search of his biological family. Elf also stars James Caan, Mary Steenburgen, Zooey Deschanel, and Bob Newhart.

Many married couples have secrets, but one pair of lovebirds discover they’ve both been living dangerous secret lives in this action thriller laced with comedy. Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt and play Jane Smith and John Smith, a suburban couple whose marriage has started to go a bit stale after five or six years. Both wish for more excitement in their relationship, but as it happens, each of them is finding plenty of thrills elsewhere. Both Jane and John are world-class assassins who will take on perilous missions for the right price, but neither is aware of the other’s secret life - Jane thinks her husband runs a successful construction company, and John believes his wife works on Wall Street. However, when John and Jane are both assigned to take out the same target, one Benjamin Danz (Adam Brody), they become aware of each other’s secret lives, and suddenly both their careers and their marriage go through some dramatic and potentially deadly changes. Mr. and Mrs. Smith also stars Vince Vaughn as an assassin with John’s company who still lives with his mother and Kerry Washington as one of Jane’s associates.

Eight years after getting a crash course in the fine art of personifying Christmas, Tim Allen returns as Kris Kringle’s replacement in this sequel to the 1994 hit The Santa Clause. While Scott Calvin (Allen) initially had mixed feelings when he became the new Santa Claus, after eight years on the job he’s come to enjoy being Father Christmas, and he and the Elves are looking forward to another holiday season when things begin going a bit wrong. Scott finds he’s becoming less and less “Santa-like,” and his son Charlie (Eric Lloyd) has become difficult enough to land on the official “Naughty” list. Scott discovers most of his problems stem from an obscure passage in his contract with the North Pole which decrees that he has to find a Mrs. Claus. Scott has little choice but to start dating, but he soon learns that when you’re a big guy from the North Pole who lacks conventional employment, single women do not come running. In order to leave him more time to search for a wife, Scott and the Elves create a duplicate Santa to keep an eye on the shop; however, the “other” Santa turns out to be more Naughty than Nice, and in time Scott has to wrestle control of the North Pole away from his doppelganger. Wendy Crewson, Judge Reinhold, and David Krumholtz also reprise their roles from The Santa Clause.

War and Peace is a commendable attempt to boil down Tolstoy’s long, difficult novel into 208 minutes’ screen time. In recreating the the social and personal upheavals attending Napoleon’s 1812 invasion of Russia, $6 million was shelled out by coproducers Carlo Ponti, Dino de Laurentiis and Paramount Pictures. Some of the panoramic battle sequences are so expertly handled by second-unit director Mario Soldati that they appear to be Technicolor-and-Vistavision newsreel footage of the actual events. Still, the film falters dramatically, principally because of a lumpy script and King Vidor’s surprisingly lustreless direction. In addition, the casting is wildly consistent: for example, while Audrey Hepburn is flawless as Natasha, Henry Fonda is far too “Yankeefied” as the introspective Pierre. Proving too long and unwieldy for most audiences, War and Peace died at the box office; far more successful was the epic, scrupulously faithful 1968 version, filmed in the Soviet Union.

It wasn’t as well received at the box office as the pictures that preceded it or followed it, but Peter Hunt’s On Her Majesty’s Secret Service was the finest of the James Bond movies and also arguably the last truly great movie in the series. James Bond, portrayed here by George Lazenby (in his only performance in the role) has spent nearly two years trying to track down Ernst Stavro Blofeld (Telly Savalas), the head of SPECTRE. He has been taken off the case by his chief (Bernard Lee), an action the pushes him to the point of considering resigning from Her Majesty’s Secret Service, just as he opens a possible new avenue of attack on his quarry. Whilst in the field, Bond has chanced to cross paths with the Contessa Teresa Di Vicenzo (Diana Rigg), a beautiful but desperately unhappy woman, whom he rescues from one apparent suicide attempt and an embarrassing moment at a casino gaming table — the Contessa, who prefers to be called Tracy (”Teresa was a saint”), is the daughter of Marc Ange Draco (Gabriele Ferzetti), an industrial and construction magnate and also a crime boss, who is impressed with Bond personally as well as professionally, and would like to see him marry his daughter. Bond is, at first, unwilling to involve himself with a woman — any woman — on that level, but Draco’s underworld contacts give Bond a vital clue to Blofeld’s whereabouts that get him back on the case and hot on the man’s trail. Journeying incognito to Blofeld’s mountaintop retreat in the Swiss Alps, Bond finds the criminal mastermind posing as a would-be nobleman and also as a philanthropist, running a clinic devoted to the treatment and eradication of allergies. It’s all a front for a surprisingly sinister (and scientifically valid) plot for international blackmail that would make any previous Bond villain quake in fear. And in the process of staying alive long enough to have a chance of stopping Blofeld, Bond discovers the Tracy is truly like no woman he’s ever known before — one special enough that he finds himself willing to give up his life as a free-living, free-loving bachelor.